“Though I may seem at times somewhat distant from you, through the gray mist of my own moods, I am never far; my thoughts always circle around you.”—Friedrich Nietzsche, from Selected Letters (Hackett Pub. Co., 1996)
Sometimes I look in the mirror and find my appearance to be so arbitrary (that being said, I work in Fashion and Beauty so perhaps I’m more aware of the way I look than many). We are all so attached to the way we look and are so touchy about our physical appearance because we take it all so personally.
However I really believe that the exterior is only one thing: a determinant in how hard or easy it is to truly express ourselves.
What I mean is, someone who is truly a good person might find it more difficult to express his kind sentiments when he’s judged negatively on his appearance. The person who is sociopathic and selfish will find it easy to exert their evilness to a high degree without it being considered such, if they are beautiful and treated wonderfully because of it.
Our spheres of influence expand and contract based on our level of physical beauty.
Our inner beauty only enhances our physical beauty. Or in some fields, your inner beauty may be perceived as a weakness and devalue your physical beauty, because it’s “cool” to be cold and mean.
Sometimes our personalities and intentions evolve based on how we’re treated because of our appearance. The cheerleader is mean because she can be, because she is pretty.
For those that maintain their integrity, their message, and the way they really want to be despite physical image- hats off to you. Not an easy battle.
Our physical appearance is a filter which can distort the way our personalities are perceived.
I really hope that we can all see through the filters, but it’s hard for most.
Every man is the sum total of his reactions to experience. As your experiences differ and multiply, you become a different man, and hence your perspective changes. This goes on and on. Every reaction is a learning process; every significant experience alters your perspective.
So it would seem foolish, would it not, to adjust our lives to the demands of a goal we see from a different angle every day? How could we ever hope to accomplish anything other than galloping neurosis?
The answer, then, must not deal with goals at all, or not with tangible goals, anyway. It would take reams of paper to develop this subject to fulfillment. God only knows how many books have been written on “the meaning of man” and that sort of thing, and god only knows how many people have pondered the subject. (I use the term “god only knows” purely as an expression.)* There’s very little sense in my trying to give it up to you in the proverbial nutshell, because I’m the first to admit my absolute lack of qualifications for reducing the meaning of life to one or two paragraphs.
“To achieve accurate knowledge of others, if such a thing were possible, we could only ever arrive at it through the slow and unsure recognition of our own initial optical inaccuracies. However, such knowledge is not possible: for, while our vision of others is being adjusted, they, who are not made of mere brute matter, are also changing; we think we have managed to see them more clearly, but they shift; and when we believe we have them fully in focus, it is merely our older images of them that we have clarified, but which are themselves already out of date.”—Swann’s Way- Marcel Proust
You mutually attract AND naturally maintain relationships with people who are like you. When you feel the most comfortable with yourself take a look around at those that are closest to you at that moment. That will tell you a lot about yourself and who you really are.
“Well, you’ve seen people in a relationship that was very strong to them, and when that relationship ended they were never exactly quite the same afterwards. They were never able to fully trust or embrace or invest in another person again. I wonder if it was sort of along those kind of lines. Once you’ve lost that love of your life or that person you are connected to, somehow you’re in a different place the whole rest of your life. You’d be very, very lucky if you had anything like it again. I’ve seen that happen with some friends and people I know. They’re changed forever from a relationship that didn’t work out. I could see that kind of applying to this too, maybe.”—Paul Thomas Anderson (via bbook)